Below are some steps you can take if you have step children in your home. This can be a very difficult and scary transition for both the step parent and the child.
1. One of the worse things a step parent can do is treat their biological children "better" then the step children. Be sure to be consistent with both your child and your significant others child. Do not "brag" about the fun activities you and your child did while the step child is away. Hard feelings play a HUGE role in a relationship between step parent and step child.
2. In the beginning of the relationship be sure to sit down with the step children and let them know you have no intention of replacing their other parent. If they overstep on rules tell them you are the adult in charge and you expect them to follow the rules of the house. Of course it is always best to have the biological parent reprimand the child but let's face it they cannot be there all the time.
3. Do not come into the marriage or relationship expecting the children to instantly like you. It takes work and a lot of patience.
4. A big no no is never ever bad mouth about the other parent. I cannot say this enough. I know the other biological parent is not always liked but be sure to speak about them when the child is not around and is in no danger to over hear.
5. Plan fun activities and family outings as a "step family". This will help both the children and you bond.
6. Both the step parent and the biological parent need to agree and agree on punishment. If you do not agree do not argue or call each other in front of the children.
7. Make individual time for each child each week. even if it is just watching a movie together or going for a walk.
8. Remember some things are just not worth fighting over and you must choose your battles. Let small things go if it means peace in the house.
9. Your marriage is also important so make sure you both are working on it.
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